I Hate Fat People

I hate fat people, which means I don't like myself very much either. But what I hate even more than fat people is fat people who feel completely comfortable with their bodies and aren't the least bit concerned about what other people think. I mean, they walk around with this huge aura of confidence, that I can only dream to possess one day. Everyday I feel disgusting. Everyday I feel worthless. Everyday I feel FAT. I AM fat.

But let's look on the bright side!! Later on I'm going to Fresh Market to buy some diet pills (Yes, my mom approves b/c she thinks I'm fat too) Everyday she yells at me about my weight. She's always like "You always say you're gonna go on a diet, but then you never do anything!! You have no self control!!" Well, I'll show you, mom.

everyone thinks I can't do it........

Here's some thinspo:

Forever.

Okay, so I haven't posted in forever. As I have said before, I am a failure at life. During my break from this blog, I have come to realize three very important truths pertaining to my life: 1) I will never be skinny enough, 2) I will never be pretty enough, and 3) I will never be able to have a functional relationship because I am mildly misanthropic. The thing is, though, I was never really bothered by the fact that I hate people. It's only recently that I've noticed that I'm gonna be alone for the rest of my life if I don't change this part of me. And I don't really know what it is that makes me hate them, I just kind of do. It's really been getting to me physically too. I feel abnormal and uncomfortable everyday at school. I never used to have a problem with my singularity, but now I also feel like I can't emotionally connect to the few people that I do like.

And, as for 1 and 2, I always seem to come up short of the pretty, skinny girl that every guy wants to be with. But not just on that end of the spectrum either. It seems like everything I do these days is just never enough. Grades, sports, singing. They all just melt together to form one big blob of insufficiency.

...i could just melt away with them...